“Do not judge, so that you may not be judged. 2 For with the judgment you make you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. 3 Why do you see the speck in your neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while the log is in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor’s eye.
Matthew 7:1-5 (NRSV)
I’ve often said if the church didn’t have people it would be perfect. People mess things up all the time. So what does a Christian leader do about it?
Cut them some slack.
It’s helpful to understand the Fundamental Attribution Error (FAE).
We make the Fundamental Attribution Error when we attribute other people’s actions to their character or personality. Conversely, we explain our own actions in terms of situational factors.
When someone cuts you off in traffic, they’re a jerk.
When you cut someone off in traffic, you couldn’t help it. You were running late and you looked before you changed lanes. You just didn’t see the other car.
How about a church example? When someone misses a church meeting because they forgot, you decide they just don’t care about God’s work in the church. Or that they’re unorganized. Or that they have their priorities out of line. Or all three.
When you miss a meeting because you forgot, it’s because you had way too much going on. There was that project to finish, your aging mother called and talked for 30 minutes and then you got distracted by an article in the paper about how hover boards catch on fire. But you’re a good person and you care about God’s work.
What the FAE points out is that human behavior is largely influenced by situational factors.
We understand that for ourselves. But we don’t give others a break.
As Dan & Chip Heath state in their book, Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard, “What looks like a person problem is (often) a situation problem.”
They cite a 2002 study by Brian Wansink from Cornell University. Moviegoers were randomly given medium or large containers of free popcorn that was either fresh or stale. The result: container size was a direct influence on popcorn consumption. Moviegoers ate 45.3% more fresh popcorn when given larger containers. Even more surprising was that they ate 33.6% more stale popcorn (14 days old) when given larger containers.
Or, as the Heath brothers comment, those with larger buckets were transformed into “popcorn-gorging gluttons” as a result of their situation.
What if we took seriously the idea that we will be judged in the same way that we judge others, as Jesus says in Matthew 7:2?
Perhaps we would look at the situation of others to try to explain their behavior instead of being critical of their character or personality. Perhaps we would cut them some slack.
As I’ve mentored pastors over the years, my family systems training has taught me to ask one question when someone starts to act up in the church. “What’s going on in their personal life?” More often than not, when a Christian leader has come to me with a problem in the church it’s a situation problem, not a person a problem.
More importantly, when we start to look at how people behave in terms of the situation, we have a much greater opportunity to find ways to lead change.
What would you rather do, try to change people or try to change the situation?
For example, let’s say that you have families in church that come some of the time, but often miss church for several weeks at a time. Or the parents drop off their kids to Sunday School, but rarely come to church. The FAE would cause us to think that these parents are not committed to their own spiritual growth and/or to modeling a commitment to God for their children.
Understanding the FAE would cause us to dig deeper. To ask, “What are the situational factors that contribute to this lack of commitment?”
What we may find is that Sundays are one of the few days when they get a break. They’re tired and it’s a challenge to get kids ready for church, bring them to Sunday School, then stay for an hour of church. They may also have activities such as sports or the arts that they have to get to on Sunday afternoons. The bottom line: they’d like to be more committed but it’s a really hard.
Understanding this, some churches have decided to offer a worship service that runs concurrently with the Sunday School hour. All of a sudden, parents can come to church and worship without having to supervise their kids AND their kids are getting a Christian education. If the service is early enough, say no later than 10am, they can be on their way to Sunday afternoon activities without missing a beat.
What we thought was a person problem was really a situation problem.
Understanding the Fundamental Attribution Error can help us to see things in ways that make us more effective leaders.
Reflection Questions:
How do you explain your behaviors in terms of situational factors?
How do you explain others’ behaviors in terms of character or personality?
What would it look like in the church if we looked at others’ behaviors as we do our own?
